Post by livnaravul on Oct 31, 2005 5:47:58 GMT -5
SPOILERS FOR HBP
Rating: PG
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER ONE:
Dumbledore isn’t really Dumbledore at all, but Obi-wan Kenobi in disguise, in the next book, it’ll turn out he was made even more powerful by dying and shall whisper things in Harry’s ear.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWO:
Severus Snape is a vampire, Sanguine is his brother.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER THREE:
Severus Snape is not a vampire, Sanguine is not his brother.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FOUR:
Dumbledore’s pensieve was LYING, it made those memories up- in truth, he actually accidentally put in milk mixed with lemonade.
CONPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FIVE:
Harry’s glasses have changed shape.
CONSPIRACY THEOR NUMBER SIX:
Nymphadora Tonks is really Molly Weasley in disguise, Molly Weasley is a death eater in disguise.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SEVEN:
Molly Weasley is in love with Remus Lupin because he has a hairy back.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER EIGHT:
The note in the locket will actually be of major importance and not an excuse for a winding sub-plot.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER NINE:
Harry’s potions text book is actually Voldemort’s half brother and will play a major role in Harry’s downfall.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TEN:
The Hogwarts Express now comes with matching slippers.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER ELEVEN:
Dumbledore had no idea that Severus Snape had to kill him.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWELVE:
Albus was actually Draco and Draco was actually Moaning Myrtle who in turn was Albus which means he was already dead to begin with.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER THIRTEEN:
Voldemort’s past is completely necessary to the next book which is why at least an hours worth of reading time was devoted to it.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FOURTEEN:
The fact that Vol de mort’ s name literally translates from French to English as ‘flight of death’ had absolutely nothing to do with him choosing that name it was all to do with anagrams, making him infinitely cool.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FIFTEEN:
The fact that Vol de mort’ s name literally translates from French to English as ‘flight of death’ had absolutely nothing to do with him choosing that name it was all to do with anagrams, making him infinitely dorky.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SIXTEEN:
Dobby the house-elf is not a death eater.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SEVENTEEN:
Dumbeldore isn’t really that stupid, the Dumbledore witnessed in the past two books was a transfigured goat- Dumbeldore (Albus) is being held captive by his relative Aberforth who is keeping Albus prisoner in his coat pocket.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER EIGHTEEN:
Dumbeldore really is that stupid.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER NINETEEN:
The next book will be as good as the first four.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWENTY:
Harry will cease using caps-lock to express himself and realise that stressed is desserts spelt backwards.
EDIT: Rating and Spoiler warning added by Anime Monster.
Rating: PG
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER ONE:
Dumbledore isn’t really Dumbledore at all, but Obi-wan Kenobi in disguise, in the next book, it’ll turn out he was made even more powerful by dying and shall whisper things in Harry’s ear.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWO:
Severus Snape is a vampire, Sanguine is his brother.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER THREE:
Severus Snape is not a vampire, Sanguine is not his brother.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FOUR:
Dumbledore’s pensieve was LYING, it made those memories up- in truth, he actually accidentally put in milk mixed with lemonade.
CONPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FIVE:
Harry’s glasses have changed shape.
CONSPIRACY THEOR NUMBER SIX:
Nymphadora Tonks is really Molly Weasley in disguise, Molly Weasley is a death eater in disguise.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SEVEN:
Molly Weasley is in love with Remus Lupin because he has a hairy back.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER EIGHT:
The note in the locket will actually be of major importance and not an excuse for a winding sub-plot.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER NINE:
Harry’s potions text book is actually Voldemort’s half brother and will play a major role in Harry’s downfall.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TEN:
The Hogwarts Express now comes with matching slippers.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER ELEVEN:
Dumbledore had no idea that Severus Snape had to kill him.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWELVE:
Albus was actually Draco and Draco was actually Moaning Myrtle who in turn was Albus which means he was already dead to begin with.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER THIRTEEN:
Voldemort’s past is completely necessary to the next book which is why at least an hours worth of reading time was devoted to it.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FOURTEEN:
The fact that Vol de mort’ s name literally translates from French to English as ‘flight of death’ had absolutely nothing to do with him choosing that name it was all to do with anagrams, making him infinitely cool.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER FIFTEEN:
The fact that Vol de mort’ s name literally translates from French to English as ‘flight of death’ had absolutely nothing to do with him choosing that name it was all to do with anagrams, making him infinitely dorky.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SIXTEEN:
Dobby the house-elf is not a death eater.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER SEVENTEEN:
Dumbeldore isn’t really that stupid, the Dumbledore witnessed in the past two books was a transfigured goat- Dumbeldore (Albus) is being held captive by his relative Aberforth who is keeping Albus prisoner in his coat pocket.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER EIGHTEEN:
Dumbeldore really is that stupid.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER NINETEEN:
The next book will be as good as the first four.
CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER TWENTY:
Harry will cease using caps-lock to express himself and realise that stressed is desserts spelt backwards.
EDIT: Rating and Spoiler warning added by Anime Monster.