Post by Lady Mage on Feb 15, 2006 21:54:43 GMT -5
The Very Silly Story of the Bulldozer Princess
Rating: G
Once Upon a time, there was a princess named Adelaide who loved nothing more than to drive bulldozers. She drove them in her father’s victory parades, behind his golden coach. She drove them to her princess lessons with her mother, even though these were within easy walking distance. And, of course, she drove them when she was tearing down her apartments in the royal wing to rebuild and remodel it, which she did every three months, whether she needed to or not.
This princess had yellow bulldozers and orange ones- pink and polka dotted ones as well. She had over one-hundred of these pieces of machinery that she had either made herself from scraps, bought from her friend at the Royal Bulldozer market (even though their workmanship was terrible), and her favorite, a green and purple striped one, she had bought from Prince Thomas of the neighboring kingdom of Estelia. This was the one she drove in all the parades, hopped on while going to her princess lessons, and, above all, the one she used while tearing down her apartments in the royal wing which she did for re-modeling once every three months.
One early December day, the court was waiting for the assassin to come and try to kill the king, like he and his rogues tried to at that time of year without fail. The court waited with swords drawn, but the assassin and his hired gangs of thugs never came. Finally, the king and his household (and a very large one at that) decided that they had scared off those evil assassins at last, and that they needed to have a victory parade to celebrate their ‘triumph’.
This was when terror struck, for as Adelaide pulled out her bulldozer to get behind the royal carriage which had a new custom bouncy ceiling that was very expensive, a thug who looked eerily familiar jumped up into it with her brandishing a sword and looking very ferocious. Masking her fear and surprise, the princess smiled at him, and pretended like he was her beau. She then turned to him, whispering: “Wave!” He looked at her astonished, but dropped his sword, and raised his arm to wave to the crowd who had never seen him before and were wondering who he was, and were wondering if he was the princess’ betrothed.
The assassin had kidnapped Thomas, the ‘thug’ in Adelaide’s bulldozer, and the other thugs so he could scare the royal family into a state of despair. Once they were scared that he might kill their king, he would demand a lot of gold so he could buy a house to be all his own. The so-called assassin lay ready in the penthouse of a nearby building to spring onto the roof of the king’s golden carriage when it passed. He would then climb down into the royal coach and pretend to threaten the king. The assassin had been planning on this for years, but his dreams for a house of his own had never become reality. The assassin sighed, hoping that he would finally get what he wanted this year.
Thomas sighed too, not knowing that his boss was doing the same thing above him. He then looked for the first time at what he was riding in. It was one of the bulldozers that he had made! But how did it get into this princess’s hands? He had sold it to a raggamuffin. Anyways, it was good to see it again, and he patted it lovingly, not noticing that the princess was looking at him oddly.
The princess looked at the ‘thug’ curiously. He was dressed in clothes too good for a ‘thug’ to wear. Where on earth had she seen him before? He looked almost… princely. When he patted the bulldozer, she realized. This was prince Thomas of Estelia! The person she had bought this bulldozer from, dressed up as a tattered orphan! Well! It was good to see him again. Maybe he would consider making her another bulldozer like this one- the Royal Bulldozer Market’s bulldozers paled in comparison.
Meanwhile, on top of the roof, the assassin lay ready to spring onto the roof of the golden carriage. His mind counted down…Five, four, three, two, jump! And he jumped. As he fell, he thought about the kind of house he would buy or commission to be built for him. He braced himself for the impact that he would receive from hitting the roof of the royal coach. But he never hit the roof, or if he did, something pushed him back up the way he had come. He was- he was- he was… bouncing! He gave a shriek of delight and came rushing back down again. He had never had this much fun in his life!
Back in the bulldozer, Thomas turned to Adelaide, wanting to ask her if she had heard a shriek, but they had reached the end of the parade, and the princess’s cousin Ferdinand, Duke of Sesquipetaletalia was rushing to help her out of her bulldozer. Ferdinand then realized, to his surprise, that the princess already had someone to help her out of her bulldozer—Thomas!
Ferdinand stared at Thomas, knowing he had seen him before somewhere, then realizing his rudeness to someone who was obviously the princess’ intended, he asked, “I do hope you pardon my asking, most splendid highness, but of what nation do you originate?” He bowed slightly
Thomas returned the bow, and opened his mouth to speak, when Adelaide beat him to it. “He is the crown prince of Estalia” Turning to Thomas, she said in a seeming question, “Thomas will be staying with us for a little while? We have some things we need to talk over” Thomas nodded, and the princess led him off to talk.
Coming into the princess’ apartments in the royal wing which were about to be remodeled, and was already partly dismantled, Thomas felt right at home. This princess sure knew her stuff! He did wonder how she had gotten one of his bulldozers, and asked her.
“I bought it from you” she answered. “Don’t you remember?”
“No, a dirty sort of ragamuffin bought it” Thomas answered. “I was sorry to see it go. Did you buy it off him?”
“No” Adelaide sighed “I bought it off you. I was that raggy boy”
Thomas started laughing, and she joined in. “Can I see your other bulldozers?” he asked.
“But of course, your highness” said Adelaide primly, too primly as far as she and Thomas were concerned. They both broke out into gales of laughter. “Here. Come with me- they’re this way”
Three hours later, Adelaide and Thomas sat happily on the floor amid motor oil and spare pieces of machinery, busy at work converting her bulldozers from running on mechanical and gas means to being powered by magic and pixie dust. They both were seemingly oblivious to the fact that their nice clothes were completely ruined: burned through in places by the magical fire that they were using, and stained with oil.
They were bickering lightly when Thomas turned to her; eyes alight with a new idea. “Hey, we should start our own bulldozer business! We could make bulldozers for people!”
Adelaide looked at him, laughing outright at his expression. “We should probably get married if we’re going to do that. After all, they already think we’re engaged”, she said.
“Sure” said Thomas “Now where did you put that wrench?”
Three days later, hair full of pixie dust from the long work on their newest creation, Thomas and Adelaide were married in the chapel of state. Admittedly, it was not where they had wanted to be… Adelaide had always hated the dustiness of it, but it was the only place available on a Friday. The minute the ceremony was over, Adelaide and Thomas began handing out business cards to all the fairy godmothers, who were their prime supplier with pixie dust for the bulldozers they created. It turned out that several of them needed their houses remodeled, and Adelaide didn’t pass up this job. (Even royal newly-weds would need money, she reasoned later that night to Thomas)
They then went outside to ready the royal carriage, only to find that the assassin was still bouncing up and down on the roof of the royal carriage! The luxurious new roof acted as a trampoline, and the half-starved assassin was bouncing up and down on it. When Ferdinand called on him to “account for this odious misdemeanor”, the assassin collapsed. After all, he hadn’t had food and sleep in 72 hours.
After it was discovered that the assassin didn’t really want to kill the king, but wanted a house of his own, the king decided to give the assassin a house, so the same thing wouldn’t happen again. Adelaide stepped forward to build it, and Thomas supplied the house with trampolines in every room. The assassin was happy there, and even redeemed himself enough to get Christmas cards from the royal family.
In time, Adelaide and Thomas inherited the thrones of both their countries, and they were wise and just rulers. They made sure everyone was supplied with enough trampolines so they wouldn’t come and murder their rulers, and, together with their fairy godmothers, they brought the realm into a new golden age, full of interesting technology, the foremost of all being… bulldozers.
Rating: G
Once Upon a time, there was a princess named Adelaide who loved nothing more than to drive bulldozers. She drove them in her father’s victory parades, behind his golden coach. She drove them to her princess lessons with her mother, even though these were within easy walking distance. And, of course, she drove them when she was tearing down her apartments in the royal wing to rebuild and remodel it, which she did every three months, whether she needed to or not.
This princess had yellow bulldozers and orange ones- pink and polka dotted ones as well. She had over one-hundred of these pieces of machinery that she had either made herself from scraps, bought from her friend at the Royal Bulldozer market (even though their workmanship was terrible), and her favorite, a green and purple striped one, she had bought from Prince Thomas of the neighboring kingdom of Estelia. This was the one she drove in all the parades, hopped on while going to her princess lessons, and, above all, the one she used while tearing down her apartments in the royal wing which she did for re-modeling once every three months.
One early December day, the court was waiting for the assassin to come and try to kill the king, like he and his rogues tried to at that time of year without fail. The court waited with swords drawn, but the assassin and his hired gangs of thugs never came. Finally, the king and his household (and a very large one at that) decided that they had scared off those evil assassins at last, and that they needed to have a victory parade to celebrate their ‘triumph’.
This was when terror struck, for as Adelaide pulled out her bulldozer to get behind the royal carriage which had a new custom bouncy ceiling that was very expensive, a thug who looked eerily familiar jumped up into it with her brandishing a sword and looking very ferocious. Masking her fear and surprise, the princess smiled at him, and pretended like he was her beau. She then turned to him, whispering: “Wave!” He looked at her astonished, but dropped his sword, and raised his arm to wave to the crowd who had never seen him before and were wondering who he was, and were wondering if he was the princess’ betrothed.
The assassin had kidnapped Thomas, the ‘thug’ in Adelaide’s bulldozer, and the other thugs so he could scare the royal family into a state of despair. Once they were scared that he might kill their king, he would demand a lot of gold so he could buy a house to be all his own. The so-called assassin lay ready in the penthouse of a nearby building to spring onto the roof of the king’s golden carriage when it passed. He would then climb down into the royal coach and pretend to threaten the king. The assassin had been planning on this for years, but his dreams for a house of his own had never become reality. The assassin sighed, hoping that he would finally get what he wanted this year.
Thomas sighed too, not knowing that his boss was doing the same thing above him. He then looked for the first time at what he was riding in. It was one of the bulldozers that he had made! But how did it get into this princess’s hands? He had sold it to a raggamuffin. Anyways, it was good to see it again, and he patted it lovingly, not noticing that the princess was looking at him oddly.
The princess looked at the ‘thug’ curiously. He was dressed in clothes too good for a ‘thug’ to wear. Where on earth had she seen him before? He looked almost… princely. When he patted the bulldozer, she realized. This was prince Thomas of Estelia! The person she had bought this bulldozer from, dressed up as a tattered orphan! Well! It was good to see him again. Maybe he would consider making her another bulldozer like this one- the Royal Bulldozer Market’s bulldozers paled in comparison.
Meanwhile, on top of the roof, the assassin lay ready to spring onto the roof of the golden carriage. His mind counted down…Five, four, three, two, jump! And he jumped. As he fell, he thought about the kind of house he would buy or commission to be built for him. He braced himself for the impact that he would receive from hitting the roof of the royal coach. But he never hit the roof, or if he did, something pushed him back up the way he had come. He was- he was- he was… bouncing! He gave a shriek of delight and came rushing back down again. He had never had this much fun in his life!
Back in the bulldozer, Thomas turned to Adelaide, wanting to ask her if she had heard a shriek, but they had reached the end of the parade, and the princess’s cousin Ferdinand, Duke of Sesquipetaletalia was rushing to help her out of her bulldozer. Ferdinand then realized, to his surprise, that the princess already had someone to help her out of her bulldozer—Thomas!
Ferdinand stared at Thomas, knowing he had seen him before somewhere, then realizing his rudeness to someone who was obviously the princess’ intended, he asked, “I do hope you pardon my asking, most splendid highness, but of what nation do you originate?” He bowed slightly
Thomas returned the bow, and opened his mouth to speak, when Adelaide beat him to it. “He is the crown prince of Estalia” Turning to Thomas, she said in a seeming question, “Thomas will be staying with us for a little while? We have some things we need to talk over” Thomas nodded, and the princess led him off to talk.
Coming into the princess’ apartments in the royal wing which were about to be remodeled, and was already partly dismantled, Thomas felt right at home. This princess sure knew her stuff! He did wonder how she had gotten one of his bulldozers, and asked her.
“I bought it from you” she answered. “Don’t you remember?”
“No, a dirty sort of ragamuffin bought it” Thomas answered. “I was sorry to see it go. Did you buy it off him?”
“No” Adelaide sighed “I bought it off you. I was that raggy boy”
Thomas started laughing, and she joined in. “Can I see your other bulldozers?” he asked.
“But of course, your highness” said Adelaide primly, too primly as far as she and Thomas were concerned. They both broke out into gales of laughter. “Here. Come with me- they’re this way”
Three hours later, Adelaide and Thomas sat happily on the floor amid motor oil and spare pieces of machinery, busy at work converting her bulldozers from running on mechanical and gas means to being powered by magic and pixie dust. They both were seemingly oblivious to the fact that their nice clothes were completely ruined: burned through in places by the magical fire that they were using, and stained with oil.
They were bickering lightly when Thomas turned to her; eyes alight with a new idea. “Hey, we should start our own bulldozer business! We could make bulldozers for people!”
Adelaide looked at him, laughing outright at his expression. “We should probably get married if we’re going to do that. After all, they already think we’re engaged”, she said.
“Sure” said Thomas “Now where did you put that wrench?”
Three days later, hair full of pixie dust from the long work on their newest creation, Thomas and Adelaide were married in the chapel of state. Admittedly, it was not where they had wanted to be… Adelaide had always hated the dustiness of it, but it was the only place available on a Friday. The minute the ceremony was over, Adelaide and Thomas began handing out business cards to all the fairy godmothers, who were their prime supplier with pixie dust for the bulldozers they created. It turned out that several of them needed their houses remodeled, and Adelaide didn’t pass up this job. (Even royal newly-weds would need money, she reasoned later that night to Thomas)
They then went outside to ready the royal carriage, only to find that the assassin was still bouncing up and down on the roof of the royal carriage! The luxurious new roof acted as a trampoline, and the half-starved assassin was bouncing up and down on it. When Ferdinand called on him to “account for this odious misdemeanor”, the assassin collapsed. After all, he hadn’t had food and sleep in 72 hours.
After it was discovered that the assassin didn’t really want to kill the king, but wanted a house of his own, the king decided to give the assassin a house, so the same thing wouldn’t happen again. Adelaide stepped forward to build it, and Thomas supplied the house with trampolines in every room. The assassin was happy there, and even redeemed himself enough to get Christmas cards from the royal family.
In time, Adelaide and Thomas inherited the thrones of both their countries, and they were wise and just rulers. They made sure everyone was supplied with enough trampolines so they wouldn’t come and murder their rulers, and, together with their fairy godmothers, they brought the realm into a new golden age, full of interesting technology, the foremost of all being… bulldozers.
Brava <3
It was so cute and funny. But for some reason I forgot to review.
?